Tuesday, June 2, 2009

"He" was once the problem, now its me!

Okay, I updated my subheading text of this blog (upper left hand corner),
and I did so for a reason. Remember all those guys I complained about?
Well..."He" (meaning any individual I tried to have a relationship with in
the past) used to be the problem.

However...I made one very important realization lately. That "He" is no
longer the problem but that now I am. I think part of it is very much trust
issues, that I perhaps never believed that a person could love me and only
me. I guess the reason why is because I had my heart broken so many times.

Now, I guess I am the one with the problem. I myself have adapted in such a
way to think of relationships as only temporary. Is that a good thing or a
bad thing? I really don't know. All I know is that perhaps I have adapted so
much that I find I like my life the way it is.

I may never settle down. I may never get married, and do I care? Sometimes
but truth be told most of the time I really don't. I see plenty of
advantages (good or bad, right or wrong) of being single for the rest of my
life. Of just being me and just being free.

So, right or wrong "He" is no longer the problem. "I" am now the problem.
What a discovery, and this blog has taken an interesting turn.

Update 10/13/2011

I am now in the process of learning how to appreciate a person who does want
me around. It makes it easier to believe that some day I could get married after all,
even if it doesn't work out.