I am never going to bail him out. Not ever again. I may offer to pay for a dinner or purchase food for an evening out. I may even pay for admission for an event his daughter wants to go to.
However, I am no longer going to bail him out financially. It's not because I'm not a generous person, but rather because I am going through financial hardships. During these times I just do not have it in me to help other people because I am the one who needs help.
I had not seen one of my exes in awhile, but then ran into him this past summer. He asked to borrow some money from me, which wouldn't be a problem but I didn't have any.
However, it just stung for some reason that he asked me that. Therefore, I asked him, "Is that the only reason you wanted to talk to me?"
I just told him that I can't give him any money, which was true. I wasn't make as much money as I used to anyway and I really just needed to use the little bit I had to take care of myself. Besides, I sensed he was more preoccupied about asking me for money than he was about seeing me again.
It was at that time-after not seeing him for some months-that I started to open my eyes. Maybe he never really cared for me at all, but that he just wanted to use me. That is why I decided not to bail him out any more.
I also didn't bail him out any more I think he needs to grow up. He needs to learn to take care of himself. I would help him more but I can barely help myself, and I told him that.
We have managed to stay friends since, and I think he respects me because of being honest. However, it was just slightly annoying and I questioned the past he and I had. I had nothing left to give and for a chance I decided to have someone take care of me instead.